A Dream Master in love
Sometimes I think about all the dreams I have yet to make real...and I'll be damned if I can't make most of them come to life. Some dreams are of a lost childhood, a lost innocence. I have not lost more than those out there that suffer poverty and famine every day, but that is why I must work hard to give back as much as I can. Dreams of a lost family, a lost home...I'd rather give them to everyone else who still has a chance to live those things - I've pretty much burnt out my chances to experience them again.
I've still got everyone in my heart, I'll just have to learn to live with just that for most of my life. It seems every-time I try to reach out and hand my world to a single person, I do it in vain - as if to say I'll still need it, I'm not free of the responsiblities my gifts bind me to.
We live in a world where all the dreamers are frail creatures and are yet potentially dangerous.
I've kept a secret fortwo years and I will continue to keep it: I'm still in love with her. Until the day I have to let go or the day I can be with her. All great dreamers have to sacrifice something or someone - mines just happens to be her, apparently.
Like the comforts of a normal and convenient lifestyle, I have to give her up - I can't deal with the frustration of never having tried to prevail in making the most of myself.
I'd love to have a family with her, a home. But I need my arrogance, I need my pig-headed stubborness - these are the only weapons I've got against an indifferent and merciless world. I will always dream of our children, if at least that.
posted at: 03:28 | path: | permanent link to this entry